Oreo Cookies: A Review

I've written a few blog posts lately that will never see the light of day. Well, one of them might, eventually, when I figure out just how much of my soul I can stand to bare in a blog that, while actually read by a tiny handful of people, could potentially be read by anyone. Or until I figure out how to couch what I want to say in a way that doesn't reveal so much of my soul (which might be a lost cause).

Meanwhile, I recently discovered that Oreo cookies have proliferated a whole bunch of flavors, so I'm going to post a frivolous review.*

Last year I decided I was eating too much junk food, so I convinced my roommate (with whom I share groceries) to go on a "candy fast" with me. The rule was, we could eat goodies, but only if we made them ourselves. The plan worked well; within about a month and a half I'd lost most of my taste for pre-packaged sweets. Of course then the holidays happened, and we went back to eating store-bought goodies, though not nearly as much. Anyway, as I said, I lost my taste for most junk food. But not Oreos. Because Oreos are awesome.

I haven't tried all the new flavors, but here is a list of all the ones I have tried, from least to most favorite.

Birthday Cake Oreos

These ones have the normal chocolate cookies, and the cream filling has rainbow spots of food coloring, like the sprinkles in a birthday cake. I guess the filling is supposed to taste like cake, too. I'm not sure. This variety of Oreo is just gross. I didn't even finish the one cookie I tried.

Strawberry Milkshake Oreos

Awesome in theory, right? I mean, strawberries and chocolate were practically made for each other! Sadly, not awesome in practice. Maybe it's because my candy fast killed my sweet tooth, but the free sample I tried grossed me out. Seriously, it made my teeth hurt, it was so sweet. Also, the strawberry flavoring didn't really taste like strawberries. So much wasted potential.

Peanut Butter Oreos

Sorry, PB lovers. I like peanut butter as much as anyone, but peanut butter flavored Oreo filling is just not the same. On the other hand, dipping an Oreo in peanut butter is something I ought to try sometime, now that I think about it.

Heads or Tails Triple Stuf Oreos

The Heads or Tails variety of Oreo has one chocolate cookie and one vanilla cookie. The Triple Stuf variety has even more filling than the regular Heads or Tails, which, like all the other non-classics, has as much filling as a regular Double Stuf. But Triple Stuff is overkill; it is just too much filling. I felt kind of gross after eating just one.

Neapolitan Triple Double Oreos

This cookie is like a fusion between the Strawberry Milkshake Oreo, the Chocolate Oreo, and the Heads or Tails Oreo (see below). It has three vanilla cookies, with one layer of strawberry cream and one layer of chocolate cream. The problem with this cookie is, it's too big. Also, like I said, the strawberry flavoring isn't so great. But there is less of it, so it's better than its cousin. Once again, a cookie that just doesn't quite live up to its potential. I'm not sorry I bought a bag, but not likely to buy them again.

Raspberry Oreo Fudge Cremes

These Oreos have a thin chocolate wafer, a thin layer of raspberry cream filling, and are coated in chocolate fudge. If there is any fruit better with chocolate than strawberries, it's raspberries. Having tasted the strawberry milkshake variety, I was skeptical, but ultimately could not resist the lure of raspberries and chocolate. Sure enough, these cookies were overly sweet and incredibly rich. However, I had an idea inspired by the tragic effects on chocolate of Arizona's ridiculous summer heat: I put the rest of the bag in the freezer. These cookies are much better frozen. Almost worth buying again, maybe. Or maybe not. After all, with so many flavors to choose, why go for something less than totally awesome?

Classic Oreos

The original, non-double stuf variety is perhaps not that exciting, but still a very creditable cookie, and I would not snub it at a party.

Double Stuf Oreos

The second-oldest variety of Oreo is better than its older brother. Always a welcome sight at a party table or picnic.

Heads or Tails Oreos

And now we're down to the top three. With a decent amount of filling and both chocolate and vanilla cookies, this baby can't go wrong, especially if you dunk it in your cookie-complementing beverage of choice.

Chocolate Oreos

How do you make one of the greatest cookies of all time even better? Make the filling chocolate. Honestly, I don't know why it took Nabisco so long to go from regular Double Stuf to Chocolate. Chocolate cookies, with chocolate filling, dipped in chocolate (soy) milk makes a teriffic trifecta of chocolatey goodness.

Mint Oreos

The only thing better than Chocolate Oreos. It's the perfect blend of crunchy, creamy, chocolatey, cool mint awesomeness. I don't buy them often because it's too easy to consume half the bag without realizing it.

*Disclaimer: Neither I, nor anyone I know, works for Nabisco, or owns Nabisco stock, or has anything to gain financially from Nabisco. However, if Nabisco would like to send me free Oreos, I would not say no.